I was talking to a someone I know today about her new job. Everything all boiled down to this: she was feeling distraught. She’s the new girl, still trying to get acquainted. She said she felt like the black sheep everyone kept eyeing to judge, ridicule and single out. This caused something in me to switch on. An instinct I’m sure many women are born but only certain situations bring out of them. Though she is older than me, I knew instantly she didn’t need someone telling her to “suck it up.” She needed a friend’s advice. So I offered it to the best of my ability. No one should feel how she feels, especially in the environment she’s in, where MOST people work together not only professionally but on a more personal level, helping each other achieve greatness and feel good about themselves despite their length of time on the job.
My best advice to her was first and foremost, not to take things personally. Can’t let a person’s poor attitude affect yours. Next, I reminded her that everyone handles situations differently. What may seem like a poor reaction to you may be someone’s only way of knowing how to deal. That’s okay. It happens. In this world we have to deal with people as they come because the only people we can change is ourselves. Not everyone is going to agree with how you deal or how you see the world. But just like others accept you for being unique, extend the same courtesy to others.
As for my last piece of advice I told her to be patient. She’s new and just like her, everyone is getting adjusted to the changes happening at the job, in their personal lives, etc. Everyone has a cross to carry; some peoples’ are heavier than that of others. We never truly know what people are dealing with outside or even in the workplace.
I also told her that even though she feels like odd-(wo)man out, she’s not alone. She’s not the first nor will she be the last person to be in that situation. And although everything may seem like it’s never going to get better, they will. They always do.
You’re not alone baby girl- you know your friends (new and old) and your family got your back. (And if they don’t, don’t be afraid of starting over new, with new people, new vibes).
Keep a positive outlook. . .